Wednesday, May 27, 2009

#22 Ankle Socks

For many bros, there is something that damaged them severely growing up. It’s one of those things that they just don’t like to talk about because it is such a taboo subject in society today. Even if they were to bring it up, they know fully well that they would be made fun of and somehow the blame for the injustice done unto them would fall on their shoulders. Of course I’m talking about their mothers forcing them to wear tube socks as children. Seriously, what the fuck is up with tube socks? They don’t fit at all, they always slide down your leg because of a lack of elastic, and worst of all, they make you look like a bro-hater. It is these traumatic memories that cause bros everywhere to resort to a dramatic change in their footwear collection: ankle socks.

Obviously, bros love wearing sandals above all else, but when wearing shoes, bros refuse to have ANY part of their sock showing. Go ahead, examine any bros collection of socks and you will see the following:

  • Socks cut completely below ankle: This is by far the most heavily populated style in a bro’s collection. One of the great things about these socks is that they are interchangeable with any sock in the collection since no one can ever see what type of sock you are wearing. This works great for bros because when doing laundry they NEVER pair their socks. Normally they just throw all their socks into a drawer and pick out two that look similar when the time comes.


  • Ankle-hugging socks – these are socks that are barely visible when worn with sneakers. These are worn only when ALL other socks are in the laundry. These were only bought by mistake because the bro thought they would not be visible when wearing shoes. The first time bros wear these socks is normally met with cursing as they immediately realize that the socks are useless.



  • Shin Socks – these are socks your Father would most likely wear and they only exist in a bro’s dresser because they were once bought by their Mother. They are never ever worn unless you have no other options, but if you absolutely must wear them, they MUST be folded down over your foot to give the illusion that they are in fact ankle socks.

Honestly, this might be the most important post written here for prospective bros. Showing ANY sock above the ankle will immediately let others identify that you are not a bro, and instead a tool, and even worse, a bro-hater.

95 comments:

Anonymous said...

Fuck this, everyone knows that true bro always wear a sweet pair of turf-dogs with some Nike mid-calfs

Ned's Younger Brother said...

I don't know man - I could definitely see bros rocking black Nike mid-calfs back in the mid-90's Fab Five era, but these days you really don't see it. One thing I should have definitely included are knee high athletic socks. A must for any coed sporting event.

Anonymous said...

gotta agree with anonymous numero uno, this post is bogus. obviously, the author is not in the know on this subject because everyone knows true bros will rock the mid cut socks with high tops. it harks back to days on that lax field bro. mid cut nike socks are just part of the bro culture.

OB said...

Is this a fucking joke. Bros like ankle socks? Listen, bro, bros obviously only wear socks that go approximately one half of the way up the calf. They are called crew socks or mid cuts, and if you had any bro sense, you would know that. It's all about lax, and ankle socks are decidedly not lax.

See here, http://e-lacrosse.com/blogs/industry/files/2009/01/pr_adrenaline_socks.jpg

Ankle socks are the anti-poon compared to mid cut/crew socks.

What's bro is essentially the exact opposite of everything you said regarding socks. You gotta know about socks, bro.

Anonymous said...

can you post about your weekend at dewey. cause one thing i know for sure, most SIC bros got fucked up and laid at least 3 times this weekend.

bro-zone layer said...

Do bros really care about socks?

This blog is straight bro-gold, but how can we go from #21 "Bros Only Vacations", a pillar of bro lifestyle, to #22 "Ankle Socks"?

Ankle socks? I think there are more important bro subjects that must be brought to light, such as "using the word 'bro'" or "hooking up with the same bra as another bro already did".

Just food for thought my bros.

ryan said...

Yes bros care about socks and yes cut-off's are the foot wrap of choice to a true bro. If you wear mid's because laxer's do then that not bro-ish at all, that called being a poser. Cut-off's are for ankle breathability purposes and to not distract from the rest of my sick bro outfit. Unless you in the act of laxing, leave the mid's in the drawer

OB said...

Don't worry. One day you will understand. It's not about actually ever having lax-ed. Lax is more a lifestyle than a sport. It's about living the dream, and any article of clothing that is designed to not be seen, thus not enhancing any bro-ness at all, is of no use to a bro.

If your whole outfit isn't bro, go home. If you need to wear socks that aren't distracting people from other bro things you do, then - simply put - you are not a bro, because everything you do should be bro and everything you wear should also be bro. No exceptions.

Anonymous said...

yea does anyone know anything?

the first dude had it right, a bro always rocks mid calfs hands down. never ankles and they usually rock them with some nice retro high tops, or turf dogs. and no they should not stay in the drawer, they should be brought out anytime socks should be worn.

BROhemian Rhapsody said...

while i personally prefer the shortest ankle socks you can find, i can only think of ONE kid i know who wears mid-calf socks with his neon pink/green/yellow high tops and this kid is the biggest tool aka bro-hater aka non bro aka bro-nnabe it makes me sick.

he is such a fag, so whenever i see other guys wearing shoe/sock combinations like that it just reminds me of him, and i cant help but think they are bro-haters also...

straight outta B-more said...

this is the only post i can disagree with. bros are all about calf socks and fresh high tops (unless flops are worn). and yes laxin does not determine you are a bro cause their are meat sticks and wannabes that lax.

AriBROna State said...

it is fucking hot in arizona, and bros here fucking love flip flops. ESPECIALLY flip flops with bottle openers on the bottom...filthy, but drunk bras are stupid, and thus, still impressed.

Anonymous said...

black mid-calf socks are the growing bro-tradition of the entire northeast, it started out as a strictly laxer trend and is now a bro phenomenon taking over the country... then the world

Anonymous said...

i have some pairs of mid calf polo socks.....i dont think it gets any better

DoneWithB-More said...

I almost recommended this site to my boys before i read this topic. Now Im convinced that the author of this site was a mediocre-frat, probably New Jersey head who has much to learn about whats good with bros.
Ankle socks became crusty around 8th grade, immediately when young heads discovered boarding school, N.E. prep lax or MIAA lax. Even if a young head couldn't play in those two leagues, he certaintly would have known what was good if he were any type of aspiring bro.
The debate about mid-calves being bro does not exist, as mid-calf socks are a fundamental pillar of not only being chay, but also being bro. This site has little chance of survival with a topic like this. Dont bother responding to this post, as I will not being reading this site anymore.

Anonymous said...

I just read the whole site and I have to say that this post just absolutely sucks. The crew sock is an essential item of the bro wardrobe and those who say otherwise really aren't on the cutting edge of what it means to be a bro.

Anonymous said...

Mid calves and sick pair of air maxes or jordans is where it's at. I don't own another pair of socks. The only time anything else is acceptable is when the flops are on. Lax is life

Anonymous said...

Fuck no, a true brue wears ankle cut socks with a nice 200 dollar pair of Echos.

Nick said...

What the fuck are Echos... Everyone here backing up the mid-calves knows how to be a true bro. There is nothin better then slippin into a fresh pair of Left-Right specific Nike crew socks in preperation of throwin on a sweet pair of Jordans or Dunk-Highs.

Not only do they make for a smooth transition from your kicks to your body, they compliment the calvs...

quit Bro qou said...

mid-calves are for tools in high school every true bro knows that, otherwise they're there to hold onto while you're getting reamed in the ass. true story. and while im on it Jordan's are played out, bro's where sperry's everyone knows that bc its the only thing that compliments a popped collar(s).

Anonymous said...

Agreed, if you can't rock the mid-calves, you are in fact a dousche and absolutely not a bro.

Anonymous said...

Are you joking me with this? Every true bro has to rock the mid-calves, traditionally Nike Dri-Fits or some other Nike socks. Dank.

Matthew said...

Yes of course, Mid-Calves , ESPECIAllY if you are of the LaxBro Breed... Black or White both work (according to your kicks which are most likely going to be turf dawgs anyways) yee.

Anonymous said...

Come on dude. Everyone knows that a true bro wears his mid-calves and turf dogs with a sweet pair of shades.

Anonymous said...

Ned's Younger Brother has obviously demonstrated enough bro-cred that we can let the sock mistake slide. Mid calves are obviously the only thing I put on when the lower half of my leg is showing, white or black depending on the shoe.

Anonymous said...

IF you play lax, then you know that the mid calves(black or white)nike socks, along with the turf dogs and some khaki shorts makes for a real bro day.You should either be wearing a college name t-shirt or just the white Tee, that is unless your goin to the bars, you gotta wear the Polo Tee.

Anonymous said...

First off i agree with the anklesocks NYB. There is no better feeling waking up in the mourning and throwing on some anklebitters with some New Balance. This laxer above obviously isn't even good at the sport and probably goes to a school with bunk lacrosse. Comfort first bro

Anonymous said...

while at times hilarious and accurate this site is too often host to garbage like this. i feel like you must be some fucking nerd who has done serious bro sociological research but horribly misjudged some very important aspects of our lifestyle. Ankle socks are for fucking nerds and people who went to public school. crew socks are the only socks for true bros, how you could not know this completely blows my mind and honestly offends me. get a fucking clue

Anonymous said...

All these bros aren't true bros. A true bro doesn't wear mid calves with shoes. Nothing says that you are a true bro like wearing mid calves with a pair of Jordan hydro V basketball slides.

Anonymous said...

yea i live in ohio and we wear nothing but mid-calfs out here (at least at my catholic prep school) but seriously if your wearing ankle socks you look like a fukcing tool. aside from lax, just look at any football or basketball player of course they are wearing mid calf socks. Mid calfs are the only type of socks i own and i got the tan lines to prove it

Anonymous said...

i think we are witnesses to different generations of bros with different opinions on this sock thing. personally, i think mid-calfs are the way to go, but im young and every bro my age wears mid-calfs. based on prior posts NYB graduated from college in 03 or 04 so hes like 26 or 27? yea back in his prime days when he was 21 or so in 04/05 ankle socks were the shit but now theyre gay as fuck. mid calfs make u look athletic but somewhat preppy at the same time. if you want the total preppy look then you gotta go with sperrys or birkenstocks

Anonymous said...

A true bro only has black ankle socks because they never look dirty.

Smosh Bear said...

Never played lax in my life, but still gotta rock the mid niks cause theyre fly as shit. Ankle socks are for 6th graders. This is just about the only post i disagree with on this site.

BROmar Vizquel said...

Yeah high socks might have been out of style like 6 or 7 years ago but these days the nike dri fit with left and right socks are the ultimate bro socks. And they are not just for lacrosse, even though that's where they got popular, they are great for football, basketball, or any sport played by a bro.

Billy Bro said...

bro the motto is "sip, dip, and rip!"

sip brews, dip some tobacco, rip some shots (lax)

that's fucking bro!

Anonymous said...

DUDE SO LAME....
BROS WERE MID CALFES TO SHOW THE DEFINITION IN THEIR STEAKY CALVES AND TO LOOK BRO AND LAXER

IN FACT GUIDOS ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO WEAR ANKLE SOCKS

ANKLE SOCKS ARE JAMOKE...its a word i made up meaning ANTI BRO

Anonymous said...

It's all about the mid calves how many collage laxers rock them I would say 95% cuz there the chillest shit ever let's be real you can't rock dunks with out the mid calves there the way to go

Anonymous said...

surfing and lax are the same, who wears ankle socks when they surf. its all perspective bros rock mid calf at all times uunles serching for the wave

BROhammed Ali said...

Really the only way to go as a BRO when it comes to socks is the Black Nike dry-fit mid calfs, Left and Right marked for extreme swag and comfort. What is more BRO than rockin a pair of fresh Kobe's or Dunks with the Black Nike mid calfs? Nothing

Brolaf Kolzig said...

Wintertime bros wear any type of socks.
I'd say ankle socks and black mid-calf nike socks are both equally bro. Tubesocks are gay as shit though.

And NYB, it is true a lot of bros have never picked up a lax stick. This is because lax is really only popular on the east coast and bros can be west coast too.

Ryan said...

this is the worst post i have ever seen on this website it should be removed right now every bro always rocks midcalves i feel naked if i dont have em on wtf why is this on here this completley not bro at all

broptimus prime said...

bro you are wrong. bro haters wear ankle socks a true bro wears mid calfs and a sweet pair of fresh nikes 24/7. you dont know what your talking about brohater

Anonymous said...

Guys... where are you from?? Up in the Northeast all the bros (primarily lax bros) wear the mid calfs. This is coming from a girl... the mid calfs are kinda sexy. Oh and btw, I'm kinda obsessed with this site.

Anonymous said...

I think the fact that mid calves are bro and that ankles cuts are in fact for jabronis has been thouroughly established but as far shoes go i traded in my turf dogs for boaties a while ago. sperry topsiders (http://www.sperrytopsider.com/store/SiteController/sperry/productdetails?stockNumber=0197640&showDefaultOption=true&skuId=***7********0197640*M060&productId=7-100210&catId=cat90046DM) are the high tops for the older college and beyond bros

Anonymous said...

dude, dont let these guido bro haters get you down, if they ever brought that lame ass shit to Alabama, or anywhere in the south with a real greek system, they would be instant bro haters. Ankle socks are where its at

Anonymous said...

im from the fuckin center of the bro world towson md and all the bros wear the black nike mid calfs. Also under armour mid calfs are gettin legit too but not at the level of nike, everywhere else is behind us with under armour. and no white mid calfs bros only wear black

Anonymous said...

While I agree that not all bros should be classified as ex-laxers, I believe that a side note or an exception should be posted for current lax bros. In the lax world of today, lax bros are defined by their "flow" and the most important parts of maintaining this flow is to have some sick shorts, a sweet lax penny or shirt, and most importantly, the mid calfs. I urge you from one bro to another, to put in some sort of side note saying that lax bros are allowed their middies.

Anonymous said...

Mid calfs should be an exception for laxers at least, all of my bro tendencies were introduced to me by my playing lax. Its the gateway to a brotastic self

Anonymous said...

Yea, I 100% agree with every single statement on this site. But this is otrageous. You cant be rollin around with cold ankles...
its all about some midcalves

Anonymous said...

Ankle socks are for pussies. Mid's are where it's at. Especially nike mids. This site lost major credibility with me on this one.

Anonymous said...

adrenaline socks are probably the closest thing to bro if youre a laxer. this post is wrong.

Anonymous said...

this is ugly. its all about mid calfs. fuck ankle bull shit socks

Anonymous said...

Would argyle socks be considered bro? These socks come up mid calf and look legit.

Chay Cutler said...

Bros used to like this site until they found out the dude making these articles is a fucking retard. The fact that you spent your time writing a whole article about ankle socks is revolting. Its one of the most obvious fucking rules that a bro must wear midcalves.

Anonymous said...

Every real bro knows that Lacrosse (not lax) is for pussies. That sport is ruining America and children are being brainwashed into picking up that activity instead of the real spring sport - baseball.

Jeff said...

April 27 at 4:03 AM is anti-bro
granted, some bros might be baseballers, but the majority play lacrosse, and thus midcalfs are a necessity for any bro

Anonymous said...

Not gonna lie, the bros here at UMD wear midcalves first and foremost, which are almost ALWAYS accompanied by a mesh lax jersey, lax shorts, keys on an STX lanyard FACING BACKWARDS (i.e. not on their chest, but on their back), and occasionally a fitted/trucker hat.

I, myself, rarely wear socks, but, when I do, I wear ankle socks.

We're all bros here.

Anonymous said...

who ever said lacrosse is for pussies is a fucking bro hater....every bro knows lax is the shit and a solid opportunity to rock out the shin socks, just look at the terps lax squad all rocking a nasty flow and shin socks

Anonymous said...

hell yah if i get socks that are too high i send my mom back to the store for the GOod ones

Booker said...

mid calf socks = bro.

ankle socks = semi-bro.

if you wear ankle socks to any sporting event, ever, you're a pussy and a bro hater. get in the game, bros.

stix said...

the fuck bro. down here in NC we rock shin socks. if you cant hit that then you wear sperrys with no socks. if you arent doin one of those two things you are a fuckin bro hater

skimaine207 said...

bros, middies can be used for the average every day bro, i dont lax but i use middies for such activities that require them... like skiing; fuckin skiers have used that shit long before others and they are as comfortable as anything else.

Anonymous said...

are you sure Ned's Younger Bro posted this? only a bro-hater would deny that the black Nike mid calves are a staple in a bro's wardrobe

Anonymous said...

It is just a known fact that bros dress in the following outfit: khaki shorts, lacrosse shorts or perhaps some kind of colored khaki short (nantucket red...), polo shirts (with logo and perhaps stitching all over the shirt) or lacrosse pinnies, a mesh backed hat or a fitted baseball hat (with favorite team on it), sperry boat shoes sneakers or rainbow sandals made with leather (not rain bow the color rainbow the brand) and some kind of extremely flash midcalf sock. i actually get my midcalfs from quicksilver cuz i surf and lax and these work for chilling on beaches and laxing

Anonymous said...

Bros, got to rock the midclafs undebatable. The ankle socks are not chill. Perhaps rock the floppers and a nice pair of shorts. Got to keep the flow raging thru the summer maybe get a chop when its back to the year but come lax season you have to let it rage.

Anonymous said...

True bros only rock ankle socks...all you mid-calf bro haters should at least take your socks off when you're rocking those rainbow sandals

gimp said...

mid calfs are only for tools and jocks ive beaten the shit out.

Anonymous said...

sup bro, I'm a bro.
I like everything you wrote here, except, I wear nike mid calfs almost daily. I've been reading up here for awhile, and I feel more bro cuz of it. I don't want to appear to be a bro hater just cuz of my stylin nikes.

Anonymous said...

wow unbelievable that some bro-hater even considered making a post on this site. clearly lax is the shit and baseball is a sport for little retards that like to sit in the outfield and pick dandelions.

also, mid calfs, nike or adrenaline. no questions asked.

Anonymous said...

dude, everyone knows ankle socks give you blisters with nike cleats, and mids keep the turf nuts out. mids are way more practical for anyone who wants to lax all day and not some fucking poser who just shows up to practice for the pennies

Anonymous said...

Wow, baseball, seriously? thats the biggest bitch sport alive. Everyone at my school hates baseball players casue they think there raw and go 0-100 for there season. mid-calfs are legit but bro-haters wear them too which pisses me the fuck off. if there not nike's, get the fuck out. You can tell someones not a bro when they wear mid calfs with fucking sperry's or some offbrand boat shoe. Fuck that shit. Bro Haters

Dono said...

Rule of thumb:
Cut offs must be worn in any event in which you are not rolling with fellow lax bros.
If you're just rolling with bros then cut offs are the only option.

When rolling with lax bros: especially in a lax bro enviroment, midcalfs at the very least must be nike's and preferably should have some dope unique logo like a natural ice logo.

Anonymous said...

holy shit bro, i was just making fun of my bro's that were wearing shit higher then their ankles, thats just straight fuckn gay. i feel like a fucking faggot if im not wearing my under amour no show sox. on another note, this site is fucking bro, almost every subject applys to me and my bros. but i dont see no bro shit bout trappin, WHERE MY TRAP BRO'S AT. trappin is fucking bro, not to mention fuckn money. all u "bro's" who work 9-5 5 days aweek, u aint bro's, ur suckers

Anonymous said...

This is post is the only thing wrong on this site. True bros ARE laxers, and laxers where white nike mids. Hands down, no questions asked. Ankle socks are anti bro as fuck.

License to chill said...

Oh man. Literally the only post that I've disagreed with. Except for the fact that this is the BIGGEST fuck up on the site. I was fucking in love with this shit until I saw this post. Mid-calves are a must. Bro seriously, delete this shit.

Anonymous said...

the bro who who writes on this website is for sure wrong about this bros wear mid calfs one they are sick two slam pieces dig it and 3 you lax with mid calfs want really needs to be done is a post that gives a description of the laxer bro

broforlife said...

Ankle socks are the only socks bros where, long socks are for bro haters and Cali surfer geeds.

Anonymous said...

Yo fuck this shit. Mid calfs all day bitch

Anonymous said...

lax bros rock half-calfs all day

Anonymous said...

whats all this shit about long socks and lax?! lax is for no balls bitches from maryland who never learned a real sport. Real bros play rugby when they're not fucking laxbros' mothers, sisters, and girlfriends. nuf said

Anonymous said...

Fuck all of this. Mid-calfs all the way. Only true bro's wear nike elite mid-calfs. No GDI knows what the fuck those are. Mid-calfs are the shit. Also when im dressing up i either wear my nike mid calfs or my fucking argyle's bitch. If you got a problem with argyles then you know nothing about the golden sheep or the fucking horse.

Anonymous said...

bros, black nike mid-calves and sperrys or some broken down running shoes is how to do the damn thing
all of the post on this site are fuckin sweet except 4 this one and it should be fixed 4 real

Anonymous said...

its all about the mid calfs bro

Ali G as BROrat... Sexytime said...

fuck this last weekend at 4am i sliced my toe open on a mysterious piece of glass and bled through one sock, all over the floor, and stepped in it with my other sock. i had so much alcohol in my system it wouldnt stop bleeding. the next day i said fuck it and went to work in my work boots with no socks on. thats how real bros do it.
sidenote: went to the hospital 2 days later. the glass lacerated a ligament and bruised the bone. they told me i needed crutches. i saved the money and bought a case of brew. great success.

Browen said...

I definitely am not gonna back the mid calves. They are for tools and bro-haters. True bros go with the ankle cutoffs. However, for some of the sexy bitches out there, they can rock their short shorts and mid calf athletic socks and look sexy as shit. This also goes with the sexy nerd look. Wearing Knee highs with a short ass skirt.

Anonymous said...

nike mid calfs = sock game...lax bros started sock game and lax bros are the kings of bros. frat guys can join in but they gotta follow the rules. ankle socks have no flow and thats what being a bro is all about

Anonymous said...

Look, what NYB is trying to say is that in casual everyday wear bros will wear ankle socks. In sporting events this is different. And I also think that it is important to mention that California Bros will wear knee high socks in casual wear.

Anonymous said...

wtf????? when do bros ever wear fucking ankle sucks bros wear mid calfs this is complete bullshit.

kristennoel20 said...

I'm a laxtitute and I just want to agree with all the other laxbros on here that this is a bunch of shit. Midcalves fill the drawer of every lax bro I know. Ankle socks? What the fuck?

Anonymous said...

Nah bros only wear high Nike socks. Ankle socks? What are you stuck in the 80's? Only clowns wear ankle socks

Anonymous said...

Ankle socks all the way. Fuck that mid calf shit.

Anonymous said...

dude, appearently i am a bro, and in cali, where i live, its all about canvas shoes and black nike high socks. if you wore ankle fuckin fairy socks, it would cut your ankle while shifting on a dirtbike. high socks, srh, metal melicha, famous, fmf, dirtbikes, prerunner trucks(mines a ranger) 40s, bitches, chillin at the lake, nice ass glasses, tats, and gettin bitches to make you sandwiches and give you dome is the fuckin bro life, and constant kottonmouth kings

Anonymous said...

Socks in general are gay and Nike mid calves are the gayest of all of them. The only people who think it's cool to wear those are high school kids and college freshmen.

All a real bro needs to put on his feet are flip flops (preferably Reefs) or Sperrys. Those two things are chill as fuck and anything else just screams "try hard" or "loser."

Anonymous said...

yo you guys know where to get puma black ankle socks because i really want them and i mean the lowest they have

Anonymous said...

black ankle socks are sexy as shit who ever wheres them are sexy as shit just saying who ever thinks there not your wrong

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