It’s Sunday night. You and 3 of your bros are sitting around your Bro Pad talking about how fucking hammered you got last night and what slam pieces you crushed. That’s when you remember – “fuck me, I have to go to work tomorrow.” Sunday nights suck because it represents the longest possible time before you can get fucked up and bang a stranger again. This is as close to depression that bros ever get. Never fear though, for the next few months bros can put away their straight razors. Why is that you ask? Because now Sunday Night means Entourage.
Bros fucking love Entourage. Bros have seen every episode and have all the seasons on DVD. If you have never seen Entourage – you are not a bro. Bros love complaining about how the show has gone so far downhill since the first season. Bros love that all the characters do is talk about getting fucked up and banging slampieces. Bros love the fact that they all completely shit on girls. Except for E, he’s an annoying little bitch. Bros have no idea how he ever pulls any tail. Bros think Vince is the worst character on the show and that Adrien Grenier is a horrible actor. Bros fucking love Ari – mostly because he curses and makes fun of gays and women all the time. This makes bros feel better about themselves, as they should. Johnny Drama is another favorite character of bros because he says funny shit all the time. If you are fat, never get any ass, and smoke weed chances are Turtle is your favorite character. And one thing is for sure – bros fucking hate Dom.
Overall, what it really breaks down to is that bros want to be the Entourage crew. Bros love the show because it really is one of the only shows on TV that portrays bros being bros. Sure every season is basically the exact same thing except for the movie Vince is working on. Sure there is no fucking way Martin Scorcese would ever cast Vince as a lead in his movie. Sure the episodes are 21 minutes long. Sure E is 5’3’’ tops and no one would ever take him seriously, much less sleep with him. But as bros we look past all this and embrace the show for promoting the two most important qualities of being a bro – getting fucked up and banging slampieces.